what do john mayer, a bread knife, christina aguilera, and a trolley car have in common?

i won't make it a habit to blog about my dreams (cause i have ultra weird ones at times, friends can attest to that) but this one from last night was entertaining, i think.

...i was at a john mayer concert. it took place in an indoor pool. 

the concert ended and as i was swimming out of the pool, i saw john mayer blocking a door in the pool (acting like a body guard to keep you from going backstage or something). 

i told him 'good show' and he said thanks in a self-deprecating, woe-is-me kind of way.

i start leaving the venue and he catches up with me outside and walks with me. 

he hands me these cassette tapes, says 'we like to give these out at some concerts' and i'm thinking 'oh cool, secret john mayer releases.' wrong: they're really old christina aguilera tapes. mmm, ok. so he keeps walking with me (i'm going home, in an unknown city though). 

we get to a corner where a trolley car is stopped. a man gets out and grabs john by the collar and asks him for money. he does this in a kind of half-joking way so we don't get too freaked out. john says he doesn't have anything, as do i (while i'm holding my blackberry in one hand and thinking 'put your blackberry away, you're not making a very good case for yourself that you don't have money'). so he lets him go and as i'm trying to get john's attention to say 'hey, please keep walking with me cause now i'm a little scared,' the guy pulls out a bread knife and holds us at 'knife' point and demands money again. 

neither of us really have money so he makes us promise we'll take him to someone we know who does have money. so we start walking, and he says 'will smith, you know where he lives, right? take me there'. and apparently, in my dream, i knew where will smith lived. so we agree (yes, john mayer and i were terrible accomplices to a robbery in my dream). so we keep walking, feeling guilty in all fairness. i decide to have us cut through this apartment building lobby. i try to get the attention of the doorman to make him understand 'the guy with us is NOT ok, call the cops.' but happy doorman doesn't pick up on the facial clues.

so we come across a convenience store and ask the guy if that's good enough. he says that's fine. so we walk in, he now switches from knife to gun and holds it up to this guy paying. everyone else in the store is totally calm, like 'oh he's not robbing us, we're ok.' the cashier gives him the money and the robber man goes on his way, thanking us in the process. 

for the record, dream john mayer and i felt really guilty for our contribution to this man's robbing spree.